Now I know that self care isn’t the most sexy topic in the world and many of you might be rolling your eyes and thinking oh no not this again but this is a big deal. Self care is not selfish. In fact it is a vital form of health care. When you are rested, regenerated, full of energy and joy – not only will you have low blood pressure, glowing skin, flexibility, strength and purpose you will be sexy as hell. Nothing is more sexy than a woman who is firing on all cylinders and loving life.

I want you to think for a moment – when I say the phrase ‘self-care’ what is the first image that pops in your mind? What is the feeling that you get?

  • Do you feel light and happy?
  • Do you feel guilty?
  • Do you imagine spending lots of money and time that you don’t have on yourself?
  • Do you see your partner and kids not eating or the world stop spinning just because you took some time out for yourself? 

I am going to be honest here. I am shit at self care!  I didn’t think it was because I didn’t like myself or think I was worthy, it’s because I can’t be bothered.        

I would rather do other things that need to be done and taking time out for me is a time waster.  I can rest when I’m dead!   Sound familiar? 

I have learnt the hard way that when you don’t take time out to rest you can be assured you will get to a point where your body will make you rest and it won’t be on your terms. Chronic stress will take its toll. Taking time for self care will reduce blood pressure, balance hormones, reduce weight, help with gut and skin issues and improve mental health…the list is endless. It really is a form of health care and its cheaper than supplements…or medications. 

I have also learnt that actually self care does represent self worth.  

Self care does not equate to selfish.

Selfish means you lack empathy, it means you have no interest or care for others, it means shitting on other people to get what you want.  Therefore having an afternoon bath can’t possibly be selfish. They are two different things. 

I recently saw a quote from Beyonce, which really resonated with me – ‘Women have to take the time to focus on our mental health—take time for self, for the spiritual, without feeling guilty or selfish. The world will see you the way you see you, and treat you the way you treat yourself’.

That last line – ‘the world will… treat you the way you treat yourself’ was a light bulb moment for me! 

If you are not taking time to rest and recuperate, if you are not respecting your body, your mind, your spirit, your soul. If you put yourself last then guess what – so will the world. 


Self care isn’t about spending a fortune at a spa or getting your nails done.

It is actually much more profound than that. It is about identifying and providing for your needs (physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, financial, social, energetic, soul).

laughing It’s about exercising and moving so your body is as fit and strong and flexible as possible so you can look after others and fulfill your dreams

laughing It’s about eating food that nourishes your soul as much as your cells and gives you the energy and tools that you need to rise up and have purpose in life.

laughing It’s about putting in boundaries and saying NO and not apologising for it. 

laughing It’s about getting rid of people who bring you down and spending time with people who raise you up. 

laughing It’s about reading, listening, watching and absorbing what YOU want, not what others want. Absorbing that which makes your energy feel good. 

laughing It’s about being surrounded by beautiful things that make you feel content and happy – doesn’t have to be expensive, it can be a tree, flowers, birds or an animal. 

laughing It’s about being mindful and having moments of silence in your life so you can tune out the noise from other people and start to really listen to yourself. 

laughing It’s about doing something that is just fun for fun sake. Get some joy in your life. Laugh until you cry or pee. 

laughing It’s about finally sorting out your mindset, reaching your goals, dealing with the niggles and not being scared to stand up, take up your space and know that you deserve to be here, be heard and be seen. 

So I urge you right at this moment it time – shut your eyes and think what do I NEED right now?  How do I want to FEEL right now? What can I do to get that need fulfilled or that feeling right now?  And then do it. Don’t muck about. Don’t question. 

JUST DO IT. One thing. Right now and then make it a habit.  

Here are some ideas if you are getting a blank: 

  • Walk barefoot in the grass or sand
  • Go for a walk in the bush or beach
  • Swim 
  • Go to bed at 8.30pm and read 
  • Have an afternoon bubble bath with candles and essential oils
  • Have a foot bath with lavender & rose geranium essential oils.
  • Do some yoga – have a chat with the amazing yoga teachers we have in the WellBeing Circle.
  • Do some of the meditations in the Mindfulness Quest or use a meditation app.
  • Start a hobby or do a craft – knitting, sewing, pottery, painting, singing, dancing…
  • Have a nana nap
  • Sit in your garden or deck and do nothing – just sit – no phone – just listen. 
  • Go for a run or do an exercise class – shout out to all our personal trainers in the Wellbeing circle?
  • Spend some time making the best dinner ever.

Have fun!  Let me know how you get on and if you are stuck, feel guilty and cannot bring yourself to take time out for yourself then email me at and book a free discovery call to discuss how I can help you, join my Facebook Group – Women’s WellBeing Circle (if you haven’t done so already) or come and join my membership the  WellBeing Club.

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